A Mothers Pain...

☆჻˙·٠•●*Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ*●•٠·˙჻☆

You see me smiling.
What you don't see is that I am screaming behind that smile.
You see me go on with everything....work....groceries.....life in general.
What you don't see is that it takes every ounce of energy I have just to breathe.
You see me alone with my thoughts.
What you don't see is me talking to Him
You see me say "I am fine".
What you don't see is the huge hole in my heart that can never be filled.
You see me and think "she's back to normal".
What you don't see is that there is no normal for me anymore.
You see me and think "Oh my God I hope this never happens to me"
What you don't see is that as much as I long for you to
understand me... I hope this never happens to you either.
You see me joking and laughing with others and think she
must be getting over what has happened.
What you don't see is that I can never forget, nor would I want to,
you don't get over the loss of a child.
You see me sad and don't know what to say so you keep going.
What you don't see is all I really want is for you to ask how
I am doing, really, and give me a hug.
You see that life goes on.
What you don't see is that the life I had will
never be the same .
You see that I am strong...... do not be deceived.
What you don't see is that I am weak and weary. Some days "I am 6 feet from the edge".
What you see is a mask....a lie. The mask helps you cope with me
and me cope with myself.
What you don't see is the raw sometimes unbearable pain.
You don't see me being unable to breathe.
What you don't see is my despair.
You don't see me screaming to heaven for God to give my son back.
What you don't see you could never understand anyway unless you walk a mile in my shoes....
God Forbid.
(Shared by a friend)