Normal...

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is having tears waiting behind every smile when I realize someone important is missing from all the important events in my family's life.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is feeling like I can't sit another minute without getting up and screaming, because I just don't like to sit through anything anymore.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is not sleeping very well because a thousand "what if's" & "why didn't I's" go through my head constantly.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is reliving that day continuously through my eyes and mind, holding my head to make it go away.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is staring at every young man wondering how old they are, if they are my sons age, then thinking how my son would be at that age and what he would be doing. Then wondering why it is even important to imagine it, because it will never happen.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is every happy event in my life always being backed up with sadness lurking close behind, because of the hole in my heart knowing my youngest son is missing.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is no matter how many children we have, there will always be one missing.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is telling the story of my sons death as if it were an everyday, commonplace activity, and then seeing the horror in someone's eyes at how awful it sounds. And yet realizing it has become a part of my "normal".

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is having some people afraid to mention my sons name.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is making sure that others remember my son.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is still celebrating his Birthday on September 2nd (1991) and then celebrating his meeting God on April 26 (2010).

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is after the funeral was over, everyone else went on with their lives, but I continue to grieve my loss forever.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is weeks, months, and years after the initial shock, the grieving gets worse, not better.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is not listening to people - compare anything in their life - to this loss, unless they too have lost a child. NOTHING, Even if your child is in the remotest part of the earth away from you - it doesn't compare. Losing a parent is horrible, but having your child die is unnatural.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is realizing I DO cry EVERY day & night.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is being impatient with everything and everyone because I'm stricken with grief over the loss of my baby.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is new friendships with other grieving mothers, talking and crying together over our children and our new lives.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is some days being too tired to care if I paid the bills, cleaned the house, did laundry, or if there's any food.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is wondering what to say when the inevitable question of: "How many children do you have?" is asked... Do I explain that I have 1 son in heaven & 2 on Earth -or- say I have 1 less child, to avoid that problem? (Of course, if I choose the latter, I'll feel horrible because I will have betrayed my son.)

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is avoiding friends - who have been friends for years, because the sight of them and their children tears my heart in two and reminds me again of what I lost.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is asking God why children around the world are dying, they are just children!

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is finding excuses not to go to baby showers and birthday parties because I don't want my loss and sadness to overshadow anyone’s special day.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is having to bite my tongue when people say stupid things because I know they mean no harm, they are just ignorant.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is being avoided by people who know my son is now dead, because they are uncomfortable talking about it.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is I NEED to talk about it.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is everyday finding the strength to get out of bed and go on living even though most days I feel like I can't.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is when I do get out of bed, I realize that today is one day closer to seeing my son again.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is knowing that 80% of relationships will not survive the loss of a child and wondering if I'll beat the odds.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is blaming myself and wondering if others blame me too.

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is knowing I will never get over this loss, in a day or a million years.

And last of all............

ƸӜƷ ♥ Normal is hiding all the things that have become "normal" for me to feel, so that everyone around me will think that I'm "normal".....

ƸӜƷ ♥ Gregory Edward Whale, Jr. ♥ ƸӜƷ

ƸӜƷ ♥ 9-2-1991 --- 4-26-2010 ♥ ƸӜƷ

ƸӜƷ ♥ Gone but Not Forgotten! ♥ ƸӜƷ

My Mom Lies

My Mom, she tells a lot of lies.
She never did before.
From now until the day she dies,
she'll tell a whole lot more.

Ask my Mom how she is,
and because she can't explain,
She will tell a little lie
because she can't describe the pain.

Ask my Mom how she is,
She'll say, “I'm alright”.
If that's the truth, then tell me,
why does she cry each night?

Ask my Mom how she is,
She seems to cope so well.
She didn't have a choice you see
nor the strength to yell.

Ask my Mom how she is,
“I'm fine, I'm well, I'm coping”.
For God's sake Mom, just tell the truth
just say your heart is broken.

She'll love me all her life,
I loved her all of mine.
But if you ask her how she is,
she'll lie and say she's fine.

I am here in Heaven.
I cannot hug from here.
So If she lies to you don't listen,
hug her and hold her near.

On the day we meet again,
I'll smile and I'll be bold.
I'll say, “You're lucky to get in here, Mom,
With all the lies you told!”

A Parents Heartache

A grieving parent is someone

who will never forget their child

no matter how painful memories are.


A grieving parent is someone

who yearns to be with their child

but cannot conceive leaving their living ones.


A grieving parent is someone

who has part of a heart

as the rest has gone with their child.

A grieving parent is someone

who begs for relief from the memories

that plague them and then feels guilty when they get it.


A grieving parent is someone

who pretends to be happy & enjoying life

when they are really dying inside.

A grieving parent is someone

who can cry or laugh at the drop of a hat

whenever they remember their beloved child.


A grieving parent is someone

who feels as if they have just lost their child

yesterday, no matter how much time has passed.

A grieving parent is someone

who sits by their child's memorial

and feels a knife stabbing their heart.


A grieving parent is someone

who wants to help others who have lost a loved one
because
somehow anothers loss is theirs all over again.

Author Unknown

Office Tear Jerks

♥¸¸.•*"Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ"*•.¸¸♥¸¸.•*"Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ"*•.¸¸ ♥

NY POST STORY - To Read the Original Story I read...

Daily UK Mail - Another version of the story...

After reading the story:

A New Jersey mom still grieving the death of her beloved teenage daughter says she was ordered by callous bosses to quit discussing the child after co-workers complained -- and was even forced to yank the girl's ballet slippers and photos from her cubicle.
Shattered and stunned, Cecelia Ingraham, 60, of Hillsborough sued for emotional distress -- but a state court last month sided with the company.
The case between Ingraham and her former employer, Ortho-McNeil Pharmaceutical in Raritan, where she had worked in the marketing department for 12 years, had been languishing in the courts since 2007.

Two years earlier, Ingraham's daughter, Tatiana, 17, had died of leukemia, and shortly after, the devastated mom began decorating her desk with pictures of the child. She also kept on hand a pair of the girl's ballet slippers as a touching reminder. But Ingraham's co-workers whined that over the next two years, the married, inconsolable mom became an office pest with her tears and depressing attitude and that -- gasp -- it interfered with their work.
Ingraham's boss allegedly told her that he had received complaints about her conduct and her "uncomfortable" interaction with other workers.
One co-worker had even griped: "What else can we say [to her] that we have not said already?"
The boss ordered Ingraham to remove her pictures of Tatiana because they were a "disruption" and to stop talking about the girl "because she was dead," according to court papers.
Ingraham testified that she asked her boss if he was telling her to act "as if she [Tatiana] did not exist."
He allegedly replied, "Yes."
She left work sobbing and never returned. Just days later, she said, she was diagnosed heart palpitations and had to have angioplasty.
She took her case to court but lost at trial.
She then appealed, and in a ruling issued Aug. 25, state appellate Judge Victor Ashrafi, wrote, "There is no question that any reasonable employer should know telling a grieving mother not to talk about her deceased daughter might cause emotional distress. But a severe reaction was not a risk that one should expect.
"The workplace has too many personal conflicts and too much behavior that might be perceived as uncivil for the courts to be used as the umpire for all but the most extreme workplace disputes," he said.
While a jury might consider that Ingraham's boss was "insensitive" and "negligent of plaintiff's vulnerability in her continuing bereavement," his behavior did not sink to the legal standard, the judge added.

After commenting on the story:
There comes a time when talking about your dead child does stop just like it does when you stop talking about your living children as well... It's when we're DEAD too! ---- Whoever complained about Cecelia Ingraham, must NOT be a parent, must NOT be a Loving person, & must NOT be a decent human being either! People who have not lost a child, do not understand... The only thing they have to compare to is the death of a PET, a Parent, a Grandparent, a Classmate, or some distant relative... I don't wish the death of a child on anyone... Not only do you miss your child, but you can never call them, text them, email them, hug them, high five them, buy things for them, etc... It is Finished... - Forgive them Father, for they know NOT what they have said & done...
by: Christina Whale-ocds

AND Posting the story on FaceBook:
I got the following comment...
It was said so well, I have to post it here as well...

I grieved so very deeply for my son, to the extent I wore black for entire year. And to be quite honest 6 years later I still cry and talk about him, I mention him every time a memory passes through my head which is continuously. I would ...cry at a moments notice. If your not allowed to talk about your child then where is your freedom of speech. The loss of a child is a long difficult road to travel. Grief is a long lonely path of ups and downs. You question your actions is it okay to smile, laugh and find life without your child? Guilt is difficult. Your child was part of you. How could you ever forgrt them. You see someone who resembles them. Your heart stops and not to be rude you star to catch a glimpse. Their life was not complete, they had lots of living to do, school, marriage, their own child. A parent should never have to bury their child. I send prayers for those who do not understand......and mostly peace.

by: Linda DeAndrea

♥¸¸.•*"Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ"*•.¸¸♥¸¸.•*"Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ"*•.¸¸ ♥

CBS Philly - Crying In The Workplace

Check out the Video at the bottom!

Two Wolves...

An old Cherokee told his grandson,

"My son, there is a battle between two wolves inside us all...

One is Evil. It is anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies, & ego.

The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, humility, kindness, empathy, & truth."

The boy thought about it, and asked, "Grandfather, which wolf wins?"

The old man quietly replied,

"The one you feed.

Sisters and Brothers in Sorrow

by Shari Soklow

I feel your tears I know your fears,
Its not just you, I have them too!
We are all the same, and at times do blame,
those who say thoughtless words..

and could never know...
how our empty, tormented hearts break so!
Feel my hug, take my hand, lean on me,
I share with you, our common sad destiny!

We are all sisters and brothers in sorrow,
Longing for a better tomorrow!
This cruel, sad, unwanted, unasked for fate!
Oh gentle earth, come swallow me up, its too hard to wait!

But wait we must, till one fine Glorious Day...
when shadows leave, and sunshine comes to play!
Wow! Here we are, at Heavens door,
..................no more sadness anymore!
Now let me introduce my son, he is my one and only one!

You say you have a son here too?
A beloved son, deeply missed all years through?
Why, look their friends, who would have guessed?
Seems like Heaven always knew what's best!

Why there's your daughter, so beautiful and bright!
Look how she smiles in that radiant light!
This gentle earth has no sorrow that Heaven can not heal!
When we re-unite, just think how great we will all feel!

I promise every word I say shall someday ring true,
Life is eternal; love is forever, for me and for you!

Turtle Burgers

CALLING ALL COOKS

A NEW RECIPE...

Red-Neck

Turtle Burgers

Here's a new twist on how to serve burgers and if you don't cook,
give this handy little guide to someone that does and request them.

What they are is a bacon wrapped burger with hot dog pieces sectioned for the legs, tail and head. First off make a bacon weave with 5-6 strips of thin cut bacon as such. 6 strips of bacon make’s a jumbo sized burger so you might have to use less bacon. Your cardiologist would agree.

Next place a slice of sharp cheddar cheese, which has a lower melting point, on the bacon. Make a hamburger patty to your liking seasoned as you wish. Then fold up the bacon ends over what will be the bottom of the patty. Carefully flip the bacon wrapped patty over onto a piece of tinfoil.

Cut up some Hebrew National hot dogs or any hot dog that you like as long as it’s a skinless hot dog. Cut the legs to 2” and the head to about 3” long. Cut one for the tail trimming to a point. Insert limbs between the bacon weaves on the sides of the burger to simulate a turtle. Cut ¼” slits in the leg ends to simulate the webbed toes of a turtle, these will fan out while cooking. You can also use whole peppercorns for the eyes.

While this is not a difficult task, it does require a bit of patience. Fasten the limbs with tooth picks to hold it together while cooking. When finished cooking remove the toothpicks the limbs will stay in place for plating.
Here are three finished turtles ready to bake.

Place on an oven rack, covered loosely with foil. Bake for 20-30 minutes at 400 degrees. A little crispy & not too crunchy, just how a turtle should be, no?

Add lettuce, tomatoes, ketchup, mustard, mayo or whatever you like and dig in.
Neat looking treat and tasty too. For an extra juicy burger make your patties with half hamburger and half pork sausage. As you can see some of my Turtle Burgers toes fanned out a little too much so make smaller toes next time. All in all not a real difficult burger. I made the 50/50 pork & hamburger patties which was juicy and tasty. Different from a regular ole burger. Kids love the novel idea too.

ENJOY!

The Last Two Photos are WELL-DONE!

MY BIGGEST FEAR

My biggest fear was to lose a son,

now I’ve lost one my fear has gone.

There’s nothing left for me to fear,

I’ve lost my baby, who I held so dear.

The worst is over, the horror is past,

The thing I feared most has happened at last,

No more do I worry, no more do I care,

nothing can hurt when a heart isn’t there.

I’ve been through hell and survived somehow,

nothing else can touch me now,

there’s nothing to fear of life to come,

I lost it all when I lost my Youngest Son...

Greggy was only 18 Years, 7 Months, & 24 Days old!

On 9-2-11, he should've turned 20!

Can We Ever Find Peace Again?

Reflections from our Founder, Ken Druck Ph.D

Perhaps above all else, we seek peace after the devastating loss of a family member or loved one.

Peace, however, is elusive, even under the best of circumstances. In times of peace, we enjoy a sense of inner calm or “peace of mind.” Our hearts and minds are at ease and we are relatively free of pain and worry. Our world is intact and feels manageable. We take a deep breath, relax and reflect about the goodness of life. Everything seems okay—we may even feel euphoric and blessed by the moment.

When we lose a child our sense of peace is shattered. Our hearts and minds go into shock and we begin an unrelenting search for answers to unanswerable questions such as: “Why did this happen?” or “How could this have happened to my child?” and “What is going to happen to me now?” Our illusions of control and our innocence, in a sense, are gone. Contemplating life without our child is unthinkable, unbearable.

It is natural for anyone who has suffered the loss of a child to wonder, “Will I ever know another moment of peace?” It can seem impossible, but is it? Are we destined to live out the rest of our lives in a state of persisting unrest and torment? Will the death of our child and our deep yearnings to be with them pervade every waking moment?

“Peace is not what peace was,” one mom told me. “It’s been three years; I don’t ever expect to feel the way I used to, but I do have moments of peace.” Always comparing ourselves to the person we were before our loss, it seems, is a surefire way to set ourselves up for failure. Expecting to feel the way we used to feel will always result in disappointment, despair and feelings of defeat. For we are not the person we used to be—how could we be? Peace simply cannot be what peace once was. Should we resign ourselves, then, to a life of unrest? Can we do something to help ourselves find peace again? And is it even possible to discover a new and different kind of peace, as we become free from many of our old fears, become more honest with ourselves and others, and strive to reconnect with our children in a spiritual realm? As a bereaved parent who has experienced peace since the death of my daughter, I have discovered the following things to be helpful:

• Peace comes in moments. Peace is not something we can count on or control, especially not in the first weeks, months and years of grief. The state of unrest is completely natural following our loss. But this does not mean we can’t ever experience, and even embrace, small moments of peace. I cherish those simple moments when they come and try to learn from them. As one bereaved mother told me, “I used to take peace of mind for granted. Now I realize that peace, like happiness, is fleeting. I enjoy every moment I get. I feel at peace savoring my first sip of coffee, the sunset, the approach of daylight.”

• Peace is no longer “innocent.” We now understand that there is always going to be suffering. We see it all around us. The news of another family’s tragic loss is something we can relate to. But, in time, we may come to see that not all of life is suffering. The possibility, if not the reality, of peace and beauty are all around us at all times. Look for peace in the small sense—allow yourself to experience a new, and possibly simpler form of peace such as taking in the beauty of a rainbow or sunset. This sort of peace, the kind that comes from inside ourselves, can be very powerful.

• We can cultivate inner peace. Walking the beach, meditating, listening to music, taking a hot bath, cuddling, lighting candles, drawing, journaling, dancing, yoga and exercising are all proven ways to relax. There’s nothing more important in dealing with grief than learning self-compassion. Finding peace from the inside out is something we can cultivate. It may not involve anything more than remembering to breathe and to cry out when we need to. Being proactive means doing those things that provide the inner calm, strength, stillness, emotional support, encouragement and energy to navigate through the storms of grief.

• Know our “demons” and the inner voices of unrest. With the loss of our loved one, our hearts have been impacted beyond anything we may have ever experienced. We’re not simply going to “bounce back.” It takes time and great patience to learn how to deal with the many voices of unrest that accompany grief, including anger, confusion, deep sorrow, guilt, blame, hatred and yearning. By getting to know and learning to respond to these voices—and creating healthy outlets for these emotions—we can exercise some measure of control over them.

• Redefine peace. Peace is not the absence of unrest. As we have discovered, peace can be temporary and fleeting. If we expect it to be lasting, we will be disappointed. Peace and unrest are two sides of the same coin. We can experience both peace and unrest at once. For example, a dad whose son underwent many months of painful bone marrow transplants told me he was torn apart when his son died, yet at peace knowing that he was no longer suffering.

• The “new” peace may encompass the spiritual. My daughter, and our continuing relationship, now exists in a spiritual realm. Reconnecting with our kids often encompasses the “bigger picture” of existence, beyond death. I, personally, find peace and joy in the hope of one day being reunited with her. Searching for and creating the “spiritual vision” of your child that brings you a sense of peace can help.

• Balance mindfulness and mindlessness. Sometimes we just need to unplug from our pain by escaping into mindless activities like watching TV, playing video games, shopping or spectator sports. This is fine if done in moderation, but we must also learn ways to be mindful and face, rather than escape or run away from, our grief.

• Count your gifts and blessings. I felt cursed when my daughter died. I was so angry and full of sorrow that all I could see was the despair and folly of life. One day, a fellow bereaved parent told me that she forces herself to focus on the blessings of her life each morning when she awakens. Even though she allows herself to be sad and upset over her loss, she also takes time to think about the good that is still a part of her life. Focusing on the things like the special people in our lives, the gifts and treasures our child gave us, the unforgettable memories, and our good health helps ward off bitterness and cynicism and balance our perspective.

• Allow laughter and lightheartedness. Laughter, even when it is dark humor, is the often thing that allows us to breathe when there is no air in the room. One mother told me she knew she was going to survive her daughter’s death when she found herself laughing out loud with her grief support group. To allow silliness, lightheartedness and the space for laughter is to allow a natural, healing process that leads to peacefulness.

• Learn to forgive. Learning to forgive, and to let go of our anger and hatred, may end the wars we are waging against ourselves and others due to our child’s death. One of our Families Helping Families Bereavement Facilitators, Denise Hankins, posits, “Forgiveness creates the space for peace to inhabit.” Ask yourself, “What would have to happen to me to forgive myself or another person?”

• Let nature show you the way. Peace is a naturally existing condition you can experience by simply getting away from the hustle and bustle, noise and stimuli of modern living. Walking, hiking, boating, getting away and simply doing nothing might allow your nervous system and brain to slow down and relax. Resting and resonating with nature lends itself to peace. Nature can also teach us a lot about spirit and the circle of life.

Peace?

A comment I made on FaceBook today...

I have accepted that I'll never see Greggy again on this earth; however the pain of his death has been getting worse & worse as the days, weeks, months, & years go by... Yeah, I have times when I can smile, talk to people, & put my thoughts & tears behind a mask... However, like other grieving parents say, it is the Most Intense Pain / Grief known... Those who have never experienced the death of their child cannot even come close to trying to understand it, even with a near death experience. I know this, because Greggy died 13 times before he was 7 hours old, but he lived! A child’s death is unlike the death of anyone else... I’ve had people tell me they understand, because they had a dog die or a parent die, I’ve experienced both & it’s not even close! When Greggy died, a part of me died with him. His death is not only painful, but profoundly disorienting, children are not supposed to die. Like Joey & David, Greggy will always be my son. I can see & hear how Joey & David continue to live their lives, I can take photos & new memories continue to be made... But I will never be able to see or hear how Greggy is doing... He will always be my baby and there is NO finding peace with his death, because Peace is not what it used to be...

What a Grieving Mother Really Thinks

Hello old friend,
Oh yes you know
I lost my child a while ago.
No, no please
Don’t look away
And change the subject
It’s ok.
You see at first I couldn’t feel,
It took so long, but now it’s real.
I hurt so much inside you see
I need to talk,
Come sit with me?
You see, I was numb for so very long,
And people said, “My, She is so strong.”
They did not know I couldn’t feel,
My broken heart made all unreal.
But then one day, as I awoke
I clutched my chest, began to choke,
Such a scream, such a wail,
Broke from me..
My child! My child!
The horror of reality.
But everyone has moved on, you see,
everyone except for me.
Now, when I need friends most of all,
Between us there now stands a wall.
My pain is more than they can bear,
When I mention my child,
I see their blank stare.
“But I thought you were over it,”
Their eyes seem to say,
No, no, I can’t listen to this, not today.
So I smile and pretend, and say, “Oh, I’m ok”.
But inside I am crying, as I turn away.
And so my old friend, I shall paint on a smile,
As I have from the start,
You never knowing all the while,
All I’ve just said to you in my heart.

Kelly Cummings
9/8/02

Greggy's 20th Birthday - his 2nd in Heaven

Forever 18

Please say a Prayer for our family,
Light a Candle, Release a Balloon, Mention his Name
or Share a Memory you have of Greggy.
...
Thank you from the bottom of my broken heart♥.
Christina, Greggy’s Mom, Forever.

♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ Gregory E. Whale, Jr. ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥
aka: Greg, Greggy, My Baby, Metal-Head,
Sunshine, a Musketeer, our 3rd Son, etc...

Today

On 9-2-1991,
Twenty years ago,
I was given a gift from God,
A Special Handful...
A Funny kid...
Always making others happy...

On 4-26-2010,
1 year, 4 months, & 5 days ago,

We Lost Greggy in a Car Accident
& Greggy met God – Face to Face...
A piece of our hearts will always be missing...

At 12:01 AM - today– it was:
1 year, 4 months, 5 days, 8 hours, & 30 minutes...
...since Greggy was alive on this Earth...
or 1.3 year – without Hearing him...
or 16.1 months – without Seeing him...
or 70.4 weeks – without Hugging him...
or 493.3 days – without Conversing with him...
or 11,840.5 hours – without his Laughter...
or 710,430.0 minutes – without his Thoughtfulness...
or 42,625,800 seconds – With Only Memories...

& the amount of time without him continues...

.....Greggy died 13 times before he was 7 hours old & placed on ECMO (Heart & Lung Machine) for 3 days. However, because of brain hemorrhages, he had to be removed from ECMO - to die... We prayed & asked God for 6 months, long enough for him to know his family... He lived...
.....After skull surgeries, ADHD, ODD, Bipolar, Dysgraphia, & a threat from the state that he was going to be institutionalized - we homeschooled him & he graduated high school at 16, went on to college full-time, worked full-time, bought his own car, lived on his own, paid his own bills, & had tons of friends who loved him...
.....On April 26th, 2010, on his way from college to work, Greggy was in a horrific & fatal car accident... He leaves behind his parents & 2 older brothers... We were blessed with:
18 years, 7 months, & 24 days
or 18.6 years
or 223.7 months
or 973 weeks
or 6,811 days
or 163,465 hours
or 9,807,939 minutes
or 588,476,340 seconds

We were Very Blessed to have him for the time we did...
♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥ We will ALWAYS Love Him & Miss Him... ♥Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ ♥

Gregory Edward Whale, Jr.

His Obituary

Our son, Gregory Edward Whale, Jr, was born on September 2, 1991 and for some reason, a reason that we don’t know or understand right now, he was taken from us on Monday, April 26, 2010 in a tragic car accident.

If we had known that Monday would have been the last day here on earth for our son, we would of taken time to share more of him with others, so that you would know what a gift from God we were given and understand the loss that we are feeling right now.

Gregory is gone, but will always be a part of us. He is gone, but not forgotten. We know that some day we will see him again. But, now alone without him, his brothers and the rest of us, must go on. May all of us that knew him take a small piece of something that he shared with us. Whether it was the way to face life… or how he would walk into a room and say one word and make us all stop and think of what he just said… yes, even if the word was “Pineapple”

Life handed him so many challenges from day one, but he met everyone one of them head on, doing it his way no matter what. He lived more in his short 18 years here on earth, than most people lived in a lifetime.

He left behind his parents, Gregory & Christina Whale, our other two sons, Joseph Whale of Florida and David Whale of Palmyra. Grandparents Deacon & Mrs. William Whale of Florida and Ruth Back of Harrisburg; 4 aunts, 2 uncles, 10 cousins and loads and loads of other relatives who will miss him beyond words.

He was homeschooled and graduated at the age of 16 and went on to attend Daytona State College in Florida and then Harrisburg Area Community College where he was studying to be a nurse, so that he could help others. In between going to school and studying he also found time to work at Arby’s Restaurant and spend time with friends.

Saying goodbye is something we just can’t do right now, so we are going to have a memorial service to celebrate his life at 10 a.m., on Saturday, May 1, 2010 at Jesse H. Geigle Funeral home at 2100 Linglestown Road, Harrisburg.

In lieu of flowers, we would be honored if you would make Memorial Contributions to John Hopkins University, ECMO Department, Baltimore, MD., where Greggy first started showing us how much determination and strength he had.

A Birthday...

I lost my son on 4-26-2010, in an auto accident. He was 18 years, 7 months, & 24 days old. He will always be my baby & his birthday is coming up. He should be turning 20 on September 2nd. The pain of his death and the void in my life has been a battle no parent should endure. The holidays don't mean anything to me anymore, even though I have 2 living sons (almost 21 & almost 22), both of whom live close by. Our oldest son is getting married in October and the realization of knowing I will never have a day like that with my baby is overwhelming. The tears just keep falling and I can't stop myself. The grief can hit you when you are in situations like this and it's so powerful you just want to run. His birthday is a day that will be very difficult for me. I'm afraid I will have problems composing myself in times like this. It's not that I want to suppress my thinking of Greggy; I just wish the tears would stop. Any help out there?? -- Chrissy